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Last night was one of those evenings where I would start to think about everything at once and found myself getting quickly overwhelmed. Most of the issues I have right now are situations I have made into scenarios in my head where I don't have the resources to meet the obligations of my family. The reality is that I am able to meet my obligations, but have real fear about possible changes in our lives that will make that more difficult (in this case insurance). I could cry the blues about all of this, but the fact of the matter is that most of the stress I have in my life today is due to a failure on my part to follow the guidelines and adhere to the principles clearly laid out in God's Word.

I must acknowledge that I have opened doors in my life that I need to close. For me, doing things that are contrary to what God would have me do is all it takes to open doors to things that lead to other things-- all the time further away from His will (as laid out clearly in the Bible) and into mine, which is inevitably disastrous. Here's an example: I have debt that I should not have. If I didn't have it, my stress would probably be much less and I would be able to give more away. I have become [on some level] a 'slave to it' as the Bible warns will happen. No more fooling myself by saying there's no problem, since I pay my monthly obligations on time. The fact is there are things I need/want to do soon that will be difficult because of the added burden of debt. I would also like to increase my giving to the church I belong to. That should be first and foremost. We do some really great things there in missions work and the Lord has certainly put it on my heart to support the effort with not just time, but my money. While I do support my church, I know that it should be [and could be] much more if I eliminated some of the other obligations I have.

I'm not writing all of this to preach to anybody. I think, more than anything, I am writing it so I will read it, acknowledge it and grow from it. Certainly, if the Holy Spirit has put similar issues on your heart, then perhaps you should heed my words and make some changes. If He has, then it sounds like you stand convicted.


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